I apologize at how long it has taken me to update. It's very hard to keep you updated as events happen and also respect the privacy of our placements.
The Boys- I can say that is was love at first site. These boys stole our hearts from day one. We had them a total of 6 months and when the "sure thing" adoption began to look like a sure thing reunification we asked to have them moved. We hated having to make that choice but Chad lost his father and it was just emotionally more than we could bear. When a child moves in as a foster child you build a wall in your heart that says "love them but remember they aren't yours" (much like your nieces and nephews). But when you are promised an imminent adoption you throw caution to the wind and knock down all walls. With foster care the only thing you can count on is change. Unless a judge has signed an order it is just what everyone hopes will happen.
After the boys left we decided to take some time to heal. We went to adopt only status and were eventually were chosen to interview for a sibling set of 2 boys. The names were so similar to the first set that it felt wrong to me to even consider it. I actually prayed God would not let us be chosen. He answered that prayer.
I ran into the boys' mom at a restaurant and was able to have a real conversation with her. She is doing great and the boys have reunified with her. I now have closure and peace about the situation. I left feeling a little ashamed that I could not support her and teach her how to be the mom they deserved. It was then we decided that we could be foster parents after all. This time with eyes wide open.
That catches you up I'll post a separate entry on what is happening now.
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